118 days

I settle down to write this after my 4th run this week. Admittedly I'm only going for 3 miles at a time, but today I didn't really notice it. Time to aim for 4 miles next week! The biggest change however is the massive increase in my fundraising total. In just 11 days I've managed to raise the £500 that Epilepsy Research UK set me, and I still have 17 weeks till M-Day.

It's been a very humbling experience reading through the names and comments on the justgiving site (www.justgiving.com/Ben-Wolfson in case you haven't donated yet!). There are people on there who donated because they're close family, and want a way to commemorate Patrick, there are my friends and work colleagues on there who want to show support, and then there are the people whose names I don't recognise, but who all say how much they miss Patrick and how they like the idea of being able to remember him like this. I've made it my mission to contact each and every one of these people (fortunately the website asks for your email when you donate) and ask them how they know Patrick and if they want to share memories of him. So far, I've got a 100% response rate (which is both surprising and unsurprising at the same time) and I also have a 100% rate for not really reading the emails. I sat down this evening with the intention of reading them, and I've skim-read 2, but at the same time it's going to be hard. Part of me thinks that almost a year on, thinking about and talking about Patrick would be easy, or easier at least. It isn't. His death is still very raw to me, and part of me feels relieved that it is still raw for others too. Each one tells a different side of this wonderful man, some are his university friends, some are relatives on his biological mother's side, and all talk about how friendly and gregarious he was, and how much they miss him. I want to collect all of these emails and comments and do something with them, but the only things I can think of (e.g. making a book) seem morbid or inappropriate. Any ideas?

In terms of the running, it's really good to be getting out there again. I didn't realise how much I missed it till today, when I had a lazy day, then went out for a short run because I could. Yesterday I went running with Mike Higgins, my long time on-off running partner at the Leeds parkrun (www.parkrun.com). When I say running with Mike, I mean we chatted on the way there and at the start line, and then I watched him gracefully bound through Hyde Park as I struggled round the 5k course. I remember a time when we'd run at the same speed, talking and nattering for miles on end. I guess I've not really run since August last year, so I'm feeling a bit sluggish, but I'd like to get back to being able to run alongside him again. Anyway, the 5k is timed with the results being posted online, so watch this space! I'll put my times on here and facebook, hopefully my time will drop over the weeks!

Right. 4 miles a run, 5 days next week. 3 weeks to go till official marathon training starts. 17 weeks today till the marathon itself. Bring it on!